We all know that having close friends to lean on is crucial. But have you ever wondered what behaviors make some people have a tight-knit group of friends?
Psychology sheds some light on this. It tells us that there are certain behaviors that can foster stronger bonds with your friends.
In this article, I’m going to share with you seven behaviors that can help you cultivate closer friendships. These aren’t manipulative tactics, but genuine habits that can make you a better friend and confidante.
So, if you’re looking to strengthen your friendships or are simply curious about what makes good friendships tick, read on.
1) They are active listeners
Active listening is a cornerstone of strong relationships. It’s not just about hearing what your friend is saying, but really understanding them.
Renowned psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “When someone really hears you without passing judgment on you, without trying to take responsibility for you, without trying to mold you, it feels damn good!”
People who have close friends to lean on are often those who have mastered the art of active listening. They don’t interrupt or try to fix things. Instead, they make their friends feel valued and understood by simply being present and attentive.
This behavior goes a long way in creating trust and understanding between friends, making it easier for them to lean on each other during tough times. Practice active listening and see how it improves your bonds with your friends.
2) They show empathy
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. It’s a behavior that’s central to maintaining close friendships.
As a kid, I remember being upset about not making the school football team. My best friend didn’t just say “It’s okay” or “You’ll get it next time”. Instead, he sat with me and said he could imagine how disappointed I must be feeling. He really understood my frustration, and that made me feel less alone.
Famous psychologist Daniel Goleman once said, “Empathy represents the foundation skill for all the social competencies important for work.” I believe this stands true not just for work, but for our personal lives and friendships too.
People who empathize tend to have friends who feel understood and supported, and are more likely to lean on them in times of need. So, if you want to be that friend, try practicing empathy. It can make all the difference.
3) They are not afraid to show vulnerability
Is it easy for you to open up about your fears and insecurities?
For many of us, it’s not. We fear judgment, rejection, or simply appearing weak. But, here’s the raw and honest truth – showing vulnerability is a powerful way to deepen your friendships.
Brené Brown, a renowned psychologist and research professor, has spent years studying vulnerability. She says, “Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome.”
People who have close friends to lean on are often those who aren’t afraid to show their vulnerable side. They share their struggles and fears, creating an environment where their friends feel safe to do the same.
This shared vulnerability fosters trust and deepens bonds. So next time you’re going through a rough patch, don’t shy away from letting your guard down with your friends. You might be surprised at how it brings you closer.
4) They communicate openly
Open communication is key to any relationship, and friendships are no exception. Without it, misunderstandings can occur, trust can be broken, and connections can be lost.
A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that open communication about feelings and problems was associated with greater friendship satisfaction. Participants reported feeling more fulfilled in their friendships when they could discuss personal issues freely.
People who have close friends to lean on are often those who foster a culture of open communication. They express their feelings honestly and encourage their friends to do the same. This leads to fewer misunderstandings, greater trust, and stronger bonds.
If you want to strengthen your friendships, remember – honesty is the best policy. Speaking your mind might feel uncomfortable at first, but it can lead to deeper connections in the long run.
5) They respect boundaries
Respecting boundaries is a behavior that often goes unnoticed, but it’s vital for maintaining healthy friendships. It’s about understanding and respecting your friend’s need for personal space and time.
I recall a time when my friend was going through a tough breakup. Instead of bombarding her with advice or trying to distract her, I gave her the space she needed to heal. This respect for her personal boundary helped our friendship grow even stronger.
Famous psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud said, “Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me.” Respecting those boundaries helps to maintain the balance in friendships.
People who have close friends to lean on are often those who understand and respect their friends’ personal boundaries. So, if you want to be a good friend, remember that sometimes, the best thing you can do is give them some space.
6) They know when to say ‘no’
It might seem counterintuitive, but being able to say ‘no’ can actually make your friendships stronger.
We often think that being a good friend means always being there and saying ‘yes’ to every request. But the truth is, you cannot pour from an empty cup.
Saying ‘no’ when you need to is a form of self-respect, and it sets the tone for how others should respect you.
People who have close friends to lean on are often those who know their limits and aren’t afraid to communicate them. They understand that saying ‘no’ sometimes doesn’t make them a bad friend – it makes them human.
Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your needs. Your true friends will understand and respect your honesty.
7) They show appreciation
Never underestimate the power of a genuine ‘thank you’.
Famous psychologist William James said, “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.”
People who have close friends often express their appreciation regularly. So, remember to thank your friends for being there for you. It’s a small gesture that can go a long way in strengthening your friendships.
Final thoughts
Friendship is a beautiful, complex dance of mutual respect, understanding, and appreciation. It’s not just about common interests or shared experiences, but also about these subtle behaviors that strengthen our bonds.
Whether it’s practicing active listening, showing empathy, being vulnerable, communicating openly, respecting boundaries, saying ‘no’ when needed, or expressing appreciation – these behaviors can make a world of difference in our friendships.
As we navigate the intricate web of human relationships, let’s strive to be better friends. Let’s lean on each other and let others lean on us. After all, that’s what friendship is all about – being there for each other through thick and thin.
Remember, it’s these small steps that can lead to significant changes. So take a moment to reflect – are you nurturing these behaviors in your friendships? And if not, isn’t it time to start?
