The teenager in me has been waiting for an app like Fart Battles since the 1st grade. Finally, Popkiller Games emits a fully functional, multi-use, fun, and stealthy fart app for 99 cents . At first, I thought it would be just another fart app (there are currently more than 1,000 available), but after seeing its “state of the fart technology,” I concluded that this one’s stench would rise above all.
Not only does this app record your farts, but it scores them based on volume, length, range, treble, and bass. Along with those very useful statistics, it also gives you facts on your fart’s humidity level, smell, and key. To record, there is a page that says ‘pull my finger’ and then gives you a count down. After recording, it gives a title to your fart, such as ‘titanic’ or ‘stank robber’, gives you a quick, funny cartoon pic and audio. My favorite so far is when your fart is ‘titanic’ it sings an edited line from the famous Titanic song by Celine Dion, “my fart will go on”. After that, you can name your fart, to remember which one it is, and add it to your fart library. Now you can use your farts to ‘attack’ or ‘fart-roll’ someone.
The attack portion is the key purpose of this app, and what gives the app its name. You can send your farts to someone else with this app, and whoever has a higher scored fart, wins. I was expecting a grand congratulation page when I won my first fartbattle, but there was no such page, and only said I won in small text next the battle, found in the completed section.
Another great feature, is the ‘fart-rolling’ option. Similar to the world-wide phenomenon called ‘rickrolling’ (click here to see what rickrolling is), this app lets you send a friend an email with a link and email title that says something someone would actually want to click on, like ‘check out this crazy video’ or ‘check out this hottie’, but the link actually just secretes your fart.
There are many other features, such as a built in flatulator, a fart box, & fartcards, to go along with your recording page, stat pages, fart library, and battle log. In the library, your farts are organized as ‘fresh’ (not yet used to attack or fart-roll someone) and ‘used’. The battles page is also organized by current and completed battles, so you can see who you blew away.
Overall, this is a great app. In fact, words cannot literally describe how epic this app is. The developers obviously spent a lot of time developing it, and it shows, or should I say, smells.
Some of my favorite parts of this app are the little things that no one else would think of, like the myriad choices of fart-rolling subject lines or the sound clips to go with fart titles. In an ordinary fart app, you would have to think of your own email subject (if this function was even available, which it isn’t anywhere else) and they wouldn’t have thought to make sound snippets, let alone the knee-slapping funny ones that this app provides.
The only negatives are that it crashed a few times when I was trying to have a fart battle, and my friend who was using his iPad, had it crash a bunch of times. Other than that, I can’t really explain how high tech and in depth this app really goes. You’re just going to have to get it for yourself. You also should check out their promo video, it’s just as great, and even funnier, than the game.
