Friendships are supposed to bring joy, support, and connection.
But sometimes, the people we call friends end up adding more stress to our lives than happiness.
The tricky part? We don’t always realize it right away.
Some friendships drain our energy, make us question ourselves, or leave us feeling emotionally exhausted.
Psychology suggests that certain types of friends are more likely to have this effect.
Recognizing these patterns can help you set healthier boundaries—or even walk away when necessary.
Here are seven types of friends who may be doing you more harm than good:
1) The constant critic
We all need friends who can be honest with us, but there’s a big difference between constructive criticism and constant negativity.
Some friends seem to find fault in everything you do.
No matter how hard you try, they always have something negative to say—about your choices, your goals, or even your personality.
Over time, this kind of friendship can wear down your confidence and make you second-guess yourself.
If a friend’s feedback feels more like an attack than support, it might be time to step back and ask yourself whether their presence in your life is truly helping you grow—or just making you doubt yourself.
2) The one-sided supporter
Friendship should be a two-way street, but some people only show up when they need something.
I once had a friend like this—we’ll call her Sarah.
Whenever she was going through a tough time, I was the first person she called.
I listened to her problems for hours, offered advice, and even rearranged my schedule to be there for her.
But when I needed support? She was suddenly too busy.
My texts went unanswered, my struggles dismissed, and it took me a long time to realize that our friendship wasn’t really a friendship—it was emotional labor disguised as connection.
Psychologist Alfred Adler once said, “The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well.”
It’s true—everyone has problems—but real friends don’t just take; they give, too.
3) The secret competitor
Some friends don’t actually want to see you win.
They act supportive, but deep down, every achievement you share feels like a challenge to them.
I had a friend like this once.
Whenever something good happened in my life—a promotion, a new relationship, even just a small personal win—she always found a way to one-up me.
If I got a raise, she suddenly had an “even better” job offer; if I shared something I was proud of, she’d brush it off and change the subject to herself.
It was exhausting—instead of celebrating together, it felt like I was stuck in a competition I never signed up for.
If someone in your life makes you feel like you have to downplay your wins just to keep the peace, ask yourself: Is this really friendship, or is it rivalry disguised as connection?
4) The energy vampire
Some friends don’t just drain your time—they drain your energy, too.
Every conversation revolves around their problems, their drama, their frustrations.
No matter how much you try to help or listen, they never seem any better.
I used to have a friend like this.
Every time we talked, I walked away feeling emotionally exhausted.
It wasn’t that I didn’t care—I genuinely wanted to support them.
But, after a while, I realized our friendship wasn’t built on mutual support.
It was built on me constantly absorbing their negativity while they unloaded every frustration onto me.
Psychologist Carl Jung once said, “The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.”
A good friendship should leave you feeling energized, not depleted.
5) The overly agreeable friend
It might seem like having a friend who always agrees with you would be a good thing.
No arguments, no conflicts—just constant validation—but, in reality, a friend who never challenges you might not be as supportive as they seem.
I once had a friend who agreed with everything I said, no matter what.
At first, it felt nice—like I had someone who always had my back.
But, over time, I realized something was off.
When I made bad decisions, they never called me out; when I struggled, they only told me what I wanted to hear instead of what I needed to hear.
It wasn’t real support as it was just passive approval.
If a friend is too afraid to be honest with you, how can they help you grow?
True friendship isn’t about constant agreement—it’s about having someone who cares enough to tell you the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable.
6) The master of guilt
Some friends don’t ask for your time and energy—they guilt you into giving it.
Every favor feels like an obligation, and every interaction comes with an unspoken pressure to prove your loyalty.
I once had a friend who made me feel bad for everything.
If I was too busy to meet up, I was “neglecting our friendship;” if I spent time with other people, they acted hurt and distant.
Even when I did what they wanted, it never felt like enough.
Over time, I realized our friendship wasn’t built on mutual respect—it was built on guilt and control.
A healthy friendship doesn’t rely on guilt to keep it alive.
7) The drama magnet
Some people thrive on chaos—and if you’re close to them, you’ll find yourself caught in it, too.
Every little issue turns into a crisis, and somehow, there’s always someone to blame.
I had a friend like this in my life for years.
Every time we talked, there was a new disaster—a falling out with another friend, a workplace feud, or some dramatic misunderstanding.
At first, I felt like I was being a good friend by listening and offering advice.
After a while, I realized something: the drama never ended because they didn’t want it to.
They weren’t looking for solutions; they were looking for an audience.
Psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own.”
However, drama magnets don’t take responsibility—they create chaos and pull others into it.
If someone in your life is constantly bringing stress and conflict, ask yourself: Is this friendship adding to my life or just exhausting me?
