There’s a vast difference between seeming successful and being truly happy.
Often, individuals who appear successful on the outside are grappling with discontent and unhappiness within.
They may have all the trappings of success but fall short when it comes to personal fulfillment or peace.
Now, you might wonder, how can you identify such individuals? Well, these folks typically exhibit certain habits, usually without even realizing it.
In this article, we’ll delve deep into these habits, shedding light on the disjointed reality of perceived success versus actual happiness.
Let’s dive into the behavioral patterns that often define those who are outwardly successful but internally miserable.
1) Constant comparison
In the world where success is often equated with wealth and status, there’s a common tendency among outwardly successful individuals to constantly compare their achievements with those of others.
This habit, though seemingly benign, can actually rob individuals of their happiness.
Why? Because when we compare, we often focus on what we lack rather than appreciating what we have.
For instance, consider the CEO who is always looking at the success of other businesses instead of feeling satisfied with his own company’s growth.
Or the popular social media influencer who feels anxious every time a peer gets more likes or followers.
When we’re constantly comparing ourselves to others, it’s like running a never-ending race.
No matter how much we achieve, there will always be someone ahead of us, making us feel like we’re lagging behind.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
If you find yourself constantly comparing your life with others and feeling miserable despite your apparent success, it might be time to reflect and address this habit.
2) Neglecting personal relationships
I’ve been there. Amidst the hustle and bustle of climbing up the career ladder, I found myself neglecting my personal relationships.
I was working long hours, chasing promotions and raises, while my relationships with family and friends took a back seat.
I was successful in the eyes of the world, but deep down, I felt an overwhelming sense of loneliness and emptiness.
In my quest for success, I had overlooked the simple fact that human beings are social creatures.
We crave connection, camaraderie, and a sense of belonging. And no amount of success can compensate for a life devoid of meaningful relationships.
Over time, I realized my mistake. I made conscious efforts to reconnect with my loved ones, to balance my work and personal life better. It wasn’t easy, but it was worth it.
Today, I might not be as ‘successful’ as per societal norms, but I’m happier and more fulfilled.
If you’re feeling miserable despite your outward success and find yourself distancing from your loved ones, it’s time to pause and reevaluate your priorities.
Remember, at the end of the day, it’s the relationships that truly count, not the accolades or achievements.
3) Overworking and burnout
In a society that values hard work and productivity, it’s common for successful individuals to overwork themselves.
The notion of ‘the hustle’ is glorified, and taking breaks or resting is often viewed as laziness or complacency.
Prolonged work hours don’t just impact physical health, they can lead to mental health issues like anxiety and depression too.
Overworking might lead to temporary gains or successes, but in the long run, it leads to burnout.
It’s a state of chronic stress that leaves you feeling exhausted, cynical, and ineffective in your work.
If you find yourself constantly working long hours and feeling miserable despite your achievements, it’s time to reevaluate your work habits.
It’s essential to balance work with rest and relaxation for overall well-being. Success isn’t worth it if it comes at the cost of your health.
4) Living for the future
Many successful individuals have the habit of constantly focusing on the future.
They are always planning, setting goals, and working towards achieving them. While this can drive them to achieve great feats, it often comes with a cost.
When you’re always living for the future, it’s easy to overlook the present.
Life becomes a race towards an ever-shifting finish line. You end up missing out on the simple joys of daily life and the happiness that comes from living in the moment.
For example, you might be so focused on saving for retirement that you don’t take time to enjoy your current life.
Or you might be so focused on climbing the corporate ladder that you don’t savor the small victories along the way.
If you find yourself constantly focused on the future and feeling unfulfilled despite your progress, it might be time to slow down.
Life isn’t just about reaching destinations; it’s about enjoying the journey too.
5) Chasing external validation
There was a time in my life when I was obsessed with gaining approval and validation from others. I wanted to be recognized, to be seen, to be appreciated.
My success, my sense of self-worth, was tied to what others thought of me.
However, the more I chased external validation, the more elusive my happiness became. I realized that trying to please everyone was a recipe for personal discontent.
The constant need for approval and recognition was draining me, leaving me feeling unfulfilled and unhappy despite my apparent success.
So I decided to shift my focus from seeking external validation to cultivating internal satisfaction. I started prioritizing self-love and self-acceptance over societal approval.
If you find yourself constantly seeking validation and feeling miserable despite your achievements, it might be time for some introspection.
True success is about feeling content and fulfilled within, not about how others perceive you.
6) Ignoring self-care
Among the successful yet miserable, there’s often a tendency to sideline self-care.
They can be so driven towards their goals that they forget to take care of their physical and mental well-being.
Sleep, proper nutrition, regular exercise, and relaxation often take a backseat in their quest for success.
But here’s the thing: neglecting self-care can lead to a myriad of health issues, from chronic fatigue to anxiety and depression.
If you’re always feeling drained despite your accomplishments, it’s worth examining your self-care habits.
Are you sleeping enough? Eating well? Taking time out for relaxation? If not, it’s high time you prioritized self-care.
Your health and well-being are crucial for sustained success and happiness. So make sure you’re not sacrificing them in your pursuit of success.
7) Sacrificing authenticity
At the heart of it all, the most important thing to remember is that true success and happiness stem from being authentic.
Many outwardly successful yet internally miserable individuals are often playing roles that don’t align with their true selves.
They may be wearing masks, living lives that society approves but they don’t necessarily enjoy.
This disconnection from their true selves can lead to a deep sense of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. No amount of external success can make up for the loss of authenticity.
If you’re feeling unfulfilled despite your accomplishments, take a moment to reflect on your journey.
Are you being true to yourself? Are you living a life that aligns with your values and passions?
Authentic living is the key to lasting success and happiness. Don’t trade your authenticity for approval or success. It’s simply not worth it.
Final thoughts: It’s about balance
The complexities of human happiness and success are deeply intertwined with our choices, habits, and values.
One crucial realization is the correlation between external success and internal misery often stems from an imbalance.
An imbalance between work and rest, future focus and present enjoyment, external validation and internal satisfaction.
Perhaps the most significant imbalance is between the life we’re living and the life we truly want to live.
When the pursuit of success leads us away from our authentic selves, it creates a void that achievements or accolades can’t fill.
As we navigate through life, striving for success, it’s essential to maintain balance.
To remember that success isn’t just about accumulating wealth or status, but also about personal fulfillment and happiness.
Whether you’re a high-flying executive, a budding entrepreneur, or an ambitious professional, if you find yourself successful on the outside but miserable within, take a pause.
Reflect on these habits and consider where you might be imbalanced.
Remember, real success is not merely about what you achieve; it’s also about who you become in the process.
And true happiness lies not in impressing the world but in being at peace with yourself.
Here’s to finding balance, embracing authenticity, and realizing that true success and happiness are not mutually exclusive but can coexist harmoniously.
